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where legends are made
PLAYER HANDICAPS AND BIOS
Name - Ross Culpan (The Nearly Man)
Handicap - 9
Bio - Three-time Greenskins champ... but not since 2014. A 9 handicap with plenty of rounds under his belt but questionable pre-game rituals of unblocking sinks and washing bed covers. Will he ditch "Wartime" or stick with the relic that's seen more wars than wins.
Name - Jamie Thomson (The Double Threat)
Handicap - 17.3
Bio - A three-time Greenskins winner and the first to complete the Greenskins/Legends double. He’s got the credentials, the handicap (17.3, apparently inflated), and a spine that may or may not last 36 holes. His back might be his biggest opponent
Name - Richard Davison (The Party Dark Horse)
Handicap - 31
Bio - Never a Greenskins champ, but last years Legends winner. With one of the fastest swings and an eye for the après-golf lifestyle, Rich could blow the competition away—or just blow up.
Name - Christopher Hodsden (The Aussie Assassin)
Handicap - 16
Bio - Two-time winner and last year’s runaway champ. Comes across just to dominate and defecate—literally. Scored over 36 points in both rounds last year and braved the gorse for a mid-round number two. That’s commitment… and questionable fibre intake.
Name - Stuart McLellan (The Legend of Legends)
Handicap - 22
Bio - A Legends legend with zero Greenskins to his name. Now off 22, which could be dangerous—if his slice doesn’t send balls into orbit. One to watch if he keeps it between the lines (and out of the car park).
Name - Andrew McFarlane (The Buggy Bandit)
Handicap - 26
Bio - 2022 double champ. Missed a round once due to “overhydration.” Rumour has it his game improves with four wheels and a roof. If there’s a buggy, there’s a chance.
Name - Stuart Gilchrist (The Broken-Back Comeback)
Handicap - 21
Bio - Two-time winner returning after injury. Bigger divots than most bunkers. Handicap bump gives him a sniff at redemption - will he carve his way to victory?
Name - Toby Garrioch (The Stag Slayer)
Handicap - 28
Bio - 2023 champ. A slight handicap raise and a taste for Red Stag make him the tournament’s most volatile ingredient. He could post 40 points… or be found singing to a bush on the 16th tee. Chaos incarnate.
Name - Matthew Thomson (The Missing Maestro)
Handicap - 15.1
Bio - Three wins and a swing smoother than the Greenskins playlist. Sadly absent this year, but his legacy (and swing envy) linger in the whispers of the fairway breeze.
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